People Pleasing: What is it? Why do we do it? How do we stop?
In my book, Is It Love or Is It Addiction?, I refer to people pleasing as over-adapting to what others want or what we imagine they want. Adapting can be a good thing. We adjust or conform to a situation or person to live cooperatively. If you agree to meet at 8, you do; you stop at red lights; you do your half of the relationship. These adaptations make life and relationships run smoothly. Healthy adaptations are thoughtful and respectful.
Love Addiction & Transactional Analysis
To the unconscious mind, love addiction makes perfect sense. – Brenda Schaeffer
Adopted as a child into a family that gave him little love or emotional support, Cary had suffered sexual, emotional, and physical abuse. As a result, he vowed he would never get close to anyone, for to do so was too dangerous—or so his childhood experiences had led him to believe.